


A Trail of Dust Particles – Alain's Journey

by reminiscence



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: Ficlet Collection, Gen, ffn challenge: indigo league challenge, ffn challenge: mega prompts challenge, non-kalos league compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-05
Updated: 2016-11-26
Packaged: 2018-08-13 04:06:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 3,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7961782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reminiscence/pseuds/reminiscence
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It started off as the simplest way to abate curiosity, and extended into a search for strength that was, in the end, far too narrow-minded. But wisdom didn't come from books after all, but from experience.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Early Reader

**Author's Note:**

> Written for
> 
> Indigo League Challenge, Mt. Moon Task – 6 drabble collection (excluding extras), first drabble 100-150 words.  
> Mega Prompts Challenge, word prompts #495 – simple
> 
> Note that this (the entire collection) was written before the semifinals of the Kalos League concluded, so it's not compatible with the episode preceeding the finals, or the finals themselves. :)

He'd always been a curious kid. He'd also been a bit of a lazy one, preferring to chase knowledge in libraries where all the books were carefully catalogued and each book had its own index.

When it came to pokemon, he preferred to see their pictures than seek them out in person because their appearances in the wild were so sporadic and often so ill-timed that he'd never learn as much as he could learn in his lifetime if he hit the road. He didn't need to watch battles so much as read compilations of every strategy ever used and the strengths and weaknesses of each. He didn't need to touch a pokemon to know how they felt.

Then he met Professor Sycamore, and he realised what he'd been missing out on.


	2. Sycamore's Assistant

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Indigo League Challenge, Mt. Moon Task – 6 drabble collection (excluding extras), second drabble 200-250 words.  
> Mega Prompts Challenge, word prompts #451 – marvellous

Professor Sycamore was far more involved with the world than he'd expected a researcher to be. He pulled the bookworm part of him out into the real world and he did it so easily. Saddled him with a pokemon first thing, said no-one could call themselves knowledgeable about pokemon without having at least one as a friend and companion.

And so Alain received his first pokemon: Charmander. And his first job as well, because the life of Professor Sycamore fascinated him far more than the life of a pokemon trainer. And received a fresh new outlook on things, because Professor Sycamore ran his summer camp for Trainers and had visitors day in and day out and found time to spend with all his pokemon as well and managed to see everything as "marvellous", no matter how mundane it looked to everybody else.

And it was a blur of colours at first: wild, dizzying colours that made him want to go back to his books but there was something addicting too. Like bitterness with a sweet aftertaste and maybe it was worth staying for that.

And after that, he began to genuinely like Professor Sycamore and the breath of fresh air he brought and the way he was always searching for knowledge and passing it on and not just from easy to find books but out in the wilderness where he had to work for it and earn it –

And he decided. He was going to stay with that man.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Indigo League Challenge, Mt. Moon Task – 6 drabble collection (excluding extras), third drabble 300-350 words.  
> Mega Prompts Challenge, word prompts #434 – challenge

Professor Sycamore was great, but he had a few weaknesses. One was his passion. He tended to get swept up in something or other and forget the world around him. Forget to eat. Forget to sleep. Forget that he was on the field and it wasn't all that safe to wander off on his own – though he did have a few pokemon to get him out of those sorts of jams.

And often, his spontaneity meant he didn't plan ahead. Sure, for things like the Kalos League, he would clear his schedule for, but he'd randomly try to contact Champion Diantha one day and generally missed her due to her busy schedule, and then never bothered to book an appointment in. It was a wonder he hardly ever missed trainers coming in to collect their first pokemon but maybe it was the look of joy on their faces when they found their first life partner that made it so rock-stable.

But Professor Sycamore did get his fair share of trouble. People breaking into the lab, or trying to steal his research, or trying to slander his name –

He hated having to put up with it, but he and Charmander just weren't capable of much.

So he decided he was going to get stronger. And there might've been a bit of a white lie involved. He did want to find out more about Mega Evolution. Moreso though, he wanted Professor Sycamore to stay in the lab more often, where he was at home and the best protected. And he wanted to get stronger so he could protect. Pick up the mega stones as they appeared and bring them back to be studied – and deal with any enemy that got in between.

But becoming a trainer had been much harder than he'd thought. He was too used to there being a manual. There wasn't one in research and he was learning that, but there wasn't one on the road and in battle and that was an entirely different matter, but knowledge formed the basis of instinct and he had that. He managed.


	4. Lysandre's Mercenary

Getting stronger was a tough road at the beginning, and a tough road at the end for two very different reasons.

It was tough at the beginning because almost everyone seemed to be stronger than him. He was forced to battle trainers far his junior to have somewhat even battles at first, and that grated at his pride. Perhaps that was part of the reason he graduated from them so quickly.

Later on, as he moved further and further ahead, the bottleneck effect ticked in. There were less trainers, the better he got. By the time he was capable of mega evolution, there were even fewer who could stand up to that. But by then he had Lysandre, who'd direct him to mega stones and mega evolution trainers, and that suited him fine. No, to be entirely honest with himself, it suited him best.

But getting there had been an entirely different challenge. Charmeleon was still Charmeleon then, and he was strong but not strong enough for the mega stone. Lysandre proved it by defeating him so soundly. Proved it again by showing him exactly what he needed to pass his limitations – too early, when Charmeleon was still Charmeleon and couldn't evolve.

But Lysandre knew he could do it, somehow. Gave him the mega stone and the Charizardite X – guaranteed him the power he sought – in return for a contract.

More people to protect. That was okay. He'd be protecting the Professor, albeit somewhat indirectly, in the process.

So he grew even stronger, even more quickly now that he had some directions on the road and didn't search aimlessly and filter through the masses by himself. And his assignments were generally searching for mega stones and searching for trainers: nothing he hadn't done before, but now there was a slightly different purpose. He couldn't send the stones to Professor Sycamore anymore. He couldn't keep in contact as often either – and at some point, he decided to cut himself off completely. He was getting into dangerous territory, after all. Lysandre Labs had the manpower to protect itself and its knowledge but Professor Sycamore did not. He was too innocent for all that. Too bright. Too full of life.

Alain could protect him from the shadows and that was fine. And as for Lysandre, he didn't have to wear the Team Flare uniform. He didn't have to know the deeper, darker secrets. He wasn't Team Flare. He worked for Lysandre and that was a trade for strength and protection and nothing more.


	5. Ash's Rival

Meeting Ash Ketchum had been entirely a coincidence. He’d been wandering around a quaint little town between orders from Lysandre, looking for mega evolution trainers. When he detected a signal, he followed it – though the end result turned out to be something a tad different.

He still had no idea what it was, but it wasn’t mega evolution – or, at least, what they understood it to be. No stones on either of them. His stone didn’t even react, though the power meter did. Maybe mega evolution still, but through a bond so powerful, the stones became unnecessary. Or perhaps the stones could be found in other forms. Minerals absorbed into their blood, for example.

It was interesting. And he wanted a closer look. So when opportunity presented itself to acquaint himself with the Greninja’s trainer, he took it. Even if they probably hadn’t needed his help in rescuing the Pikachu.

(And, for that matter, who were those freaks that swooped out of nowhere and stole a pokemon while everybody slept? And then go and attack the boy who had no other pokemon out.)

The battle was one of the best he had. Ranking under Siebold of the Elite Four and Steven the Champion, of course. Definitely a far cry from Groudon and Rayquaza (but those weren’t his favourite battles, considering he’d been injured in both). But for an evolution that didn’t even look to be the mega evolution other trainers took for granted…

He won. Easier than he liked but that happened a lot, nowadays. He’d left the pack behind. But the boy had potential. His eyes burned with the promise of a better battle when they next met.

And when that next meeting did occur, he got that better battle. Charizard went down, even, but not out. Not quite – but he might have. Who knew? Who could know? Ash collapsed before the battle could reach a conclusion, and mega evolution or not, Alain could appreciate the deep bond that allowed such a transformation to take place.

Afterwards, he wondered as to how far that battle could have gone. He’d forced Charizard down. Few had managed that, and the last had been that long battle with Rayquaza, Kyougre and Groudon. And he’d landed his first hit without that transformation. Even if Charizard hadn’t been mega-evolved at the time himself, to land the first hit without giving up the advantage in the rest of the match was a feat.

He missed the battle. He really wanted to see it again. And so he chased the boy. Went to the only place he knew he’d meet him again: the Kalos League. Went to gym after gym, wondering which ones Ash had already visited, which ones (if any), he had left to go. He didn’t ask the gym leaders though – even if they’d probably remember a trainer that stood out as much as Ash did. Didn’t mention him or his unique Greninja to Lysandre either. He wanted to find him himself. And fight him again. And learn more about that Greninja.


	6. Runner Up

They didn't meet again before the Kalos league. Instead, there were other battles, each as unsatisfying as the next and the desperation for strength – his original motive – increased. Mairin still didn't smile. Lysandre needed more mega evolution power. Whispers about the unfairness of mega evolution continued to rise and Alain worried, and tried to get stronger to overcome it all.

His desire to battle Ash again became slightly less noble, but he smiled when he saw Ash on television, smiled when he saw him at the banquet, smiled when he saw him plough through the competition, and smiled when Ash won his semi-final match and would meet Alain in the finals.

Though he frowned elsewise. He saw Professor Sycamore but avoided him. Associating with him in such a public venue would not only add fuel to the haters of mega evolution, especially considering how often he used his mega Charizard in battle. One might say he overused it, and unnecessarily but any and all amounts of experience were important. But some of his opponents could use mega evolution as well. By the time the quarter finals were underway, Ash Ketchum was the only competitor who wasn't capable of it (and that was just an assumption, as he hadn't seen him use it before – nor had he any pokemon on hand that could undergo mega evolution).

But his partner was a Pikachu. Pikachu were native to Kanto and Kanto alone. So he could very well have pokemon elsewhere, from other regions. Pokemon that could be capable of mega evolution after all.

But even after the six on six battle of the semi-finals, he didn't reveal a mega evolution or even a pokemon capable of it. Just his mysterious Greninja – who had compressed the curtain of water that had veiled it before into a mega shuriken on its back. But that was enough. The mysterious Greninja who came close to his mega Charizard was more than enough. More exciting than the battle between two mega Charizards. More exciting than the rematch that pitted six pokemon against only his two.

And then the finals. He was sure he'd win, because not only had Ash never defeated him, but his team was woefully one-sided and he'd come too close in the semi-final match against Sawyer to bring an advantage to his record. But perhaps that was cockiness. Perhaps he'd never expected to lose, just to enjoy the thrill of battling such a trainer and pokemon and bond until it was wrung dry –

But he lost the thrill somewhere towards the middle when he realised he stood a very _real_ chance of losing this six on six battle. The first battle had pitted Noivern against Metagross and this time Noivern won, despite the clear disadvantage, the fact that Metang had won before and the evolution that had followed. And the rest of their battles were so closely matched. Like the match between Ash and Sawyer, and he'd watched and thought Ash was a little too inexperienced still.

He'd been wrong. So wrong. Sawyer was far more formidable than he'd appeared, battling Ash. It definitely would have taken Alain more than two pokemon to win, even with the lack of data on his side. Ash had faced familiarity, and Ash's spontaneity and trust had still broken through all that.

Ash's spontaneity and the undiluted trust in his pokemon was breaking him now as well. Breaking him until he made a clumsy mistake and lost Weavile without doing any damage to Greninja at all.

And suddenly, it was the final battle he'd waited too long and yet not long enough for. Mega Charizard X fought against the mysterious Greninja. Struggle fought, came close – but he lost sight of Charizard in that battle when they moved to fast and too far, and Ash and Greninja won.


	7. (Extra) Oneshot: Reflections

 

The battle at the Kalos League wasn’t the last time Alain battled Ash, but it was the most significant and the most memorable. In comparison, the next battle – in Lumiose Tower, was downright pathetic.

At least they’d been able to talk after that: him and Ash, and Professor Sycamore and Mairin as well. A talk they really should have had earlier. Could have had the night before the finals if paths had crossed a little differently. Could have spared him from that dizzying blackness that sucked him in, that stopped him from fully enjoying a match that should have been just that: two trainers both aiming for the top in different ways and testing their wits against each other, like Ash and Sawyer in the semi-final match – and a part of him wondered if that hadn’t been the more appropriate set for the finale.

Instead, there’d been him who discarded the enjoyment of it all to win, and had ultimately lost. And then he’d dragged himself into a full out war he barely understood, and found that boy again, on the other side. And Ash had been the one in the right. He’d known almost nothing about Team Flare and its ideations, about the experiments they conducted on pokemon or where the energy they amassed from mega evolution went. He’d simply accepted the lies out of Lysandre’s mouth and the bait of the Charizardite X and the mega ring and the threat to Professor Sycamore. Had simply accepted that what happened to Chespie – and, by extension, Mairin, was a mere accident – and hadn’t even thought Team Flare’s less than savoury experiments were the cause.

He’d had so many opportunities to find out more. He hadn’t taken a single one of them.

He’d even helped put a pokemon into their hands for such experimentation, simply thinking it would be a good challenge and the simple execution of an order. But why hadn’t he thought about _why_ they needed to capture the pokemon as they did, with weapons and numbers and a pincer strategy that was better suited for a war than the one on one pokemon battle that should be used to catch a pokemon? Why hadn’t he even thought about those weapons?

Why had he missed every sign that had been thrust in his face?

Except Z1. It was obvious why he’d missed that one. Z1 had recognised him as a part of Team Flare – or had sensed something about him that made him weary. And so Z1 had been careful to never show itself in front of him.

And to think… Z1 had been with Ash and his friends the entire time. Choosing them: choosing their love and trust for pokemon and the limitless power that stemmed from it. The power that defeated him. The power that managed to stop a rampaging Zygadre as well and that was supposed to be impossible: the end of Kalos.

Then again, he and Steven had fought the pokemon who were said to bring about the end of Hoenn. But they hadn’t stopped it. It was Rayquaza’s arrival that had stopped them, and Lysandre masking the monolith. They’d only stalled for time, and barely that. He still remembered the ice striking his head, his back. Remembered that stabbing, frostbitten, pain on his legs from when Mairin had had to drag him to safety and how could she carry someone so much older and taller and heavier than her? But she’d done it. Done the impossible.

Mairin would have been far better off travelling with someone like Ash Ketchum. Sure, he’d helped her in catching Bebe, but he’d also stilted her journey, dragged her along to see opponents she was far too far from matching and then finally shutting her in a lab when Chespie fell. Not a single battle against another trainer since they’d met. Not a single chance to get stronger, except for the scant moments of training she’d managed to snatch when he stopped to report or take a call. She’d wanted to follow him because she was curious, and because she wanted to be strong. He’d only held her back from both of those things –

And yet, he’d begun to depend on her company somewhere along the line as well. Looked back at her and her smiles, just as he’d begun to look forward to Ash and the determined glint in his eyes. And Professor Sycamore as well, and Lysandre – and he’d tried to break free of most of those at some point or other, tried to climb past them, be the best –

What did being the best even _mean_ , now. Ash said the same thing, that day in the pokemon centre after he’d collapsed in the midst of their battle – the battle where Alain thought Ash might have won, if they hadn’t had to stop at the beginning of their endgame.

Things might’ve been different if they’d managed to see that match to its conclusion. Things definitely would’ve been different if Ash had won… Because he wouldn’t have felt the need to hunt him through the gyms, through the Kalos League, watch him climb up to the very top – the final match against him, wouldn’t have had to have that full battle that had worn out his mind and soul and the barriers around himself that he hadn’t even known were there. But now he knew and they were gone and he was left bleeding and raw and in pieces and he knew he couldn’t turn to Lysandre anymore – Lysandre who was the only person he hadn’t himself turned his back on.

But Mairin and Professor Sycamore and Ash Ketchum and their friends were all there, even after he’d turned them all away before. Mairin had draped herself around his middle and refused to let go, and she was crying – and hadn’t he so selfishly declared he’d bring her smile back and not let her cry again?

_Failed. I failed again._

                ‘But now you can try again,’ said Ash. ‘Keep getting stronger. Find your dream and work towards it with your pokemon and your friends by your side.’

But what did he want, now? To stay with Professor Sycamore again? To continue travelling with Mairin?

He’d have to find his own dream before he could know. He could do both, perhaps. Like the start of his journey, when he’d been calling Professor Sycamore with or for updates every other day. And Mairin would enjoy pushing herself into his conversations as well. It wasn’t as hush-hush as things had been with Lysandre. And they’d still travel around. And they could go slower, allowing her to battle trainers closer to her skill level, and maybe catch more pokemon as well. Professor Sycamore was curious about the tablets they’d discovered in Hoenn as well. Mairin would like to see Steven again – and he wouldn’t mind that either.

He definitely would have lost in a battle against Steven, just like he’d lost against Siebold. He’d defeated Malva afterwards though – and then lost to Ash that wasn’t an Elite Four or a Champion yet but rather a perfectly normal trainer like himself and that was a blow to the ego he hadn’t even known he’d nurtured for so long.

But before all that, he’d have to face the consequences of his actions. And Professor Sycamore may be able to smile and welcome him back, Ash may be able to grin and shake his hand, Mairin may be able to cry and hug him round the middle – but he’d still been on Team Flare’s payroll and done some of their dirty work and he still had sins he needed to pay for, both in the eyes of the public and in his own heart as well.


	8. (Extra) Poem: Strength

Strength seemed like a simple thing at first  
but it scattered: a ball of dust that broke  
before his fingers brushed its curve  
and scattered: dust particles on the wind  
he chased, and somewhere unseen, they came  
together once more while he pursued that one…

And maybe it had been the wrong one  
he pursued. But now that tiny star in the sky  
was gone, and he'd seek the sun again:  
the dust ball, all its splayed rays  
on the earth

And it might be impossible in a lifetime  
but the only way.


	9. (Extra) Poem: Knowledge and Wisdom

Knowledge was easy to gain,  
and easy to confuse.  
Books that brimmed with lies  
and only half-uncovered truths  
and interpretation, there was always  
different ways to read, different ways  
to understand  
and experience served only   
to confirm or deny their claims

But wisdom was an entirely different thing.  
Wisdom was not knowledge  
though one needed it.  
And it was not experience  
though one needed that as well  
but the combination that came  
with maturity, with growing up

And he wouldn’t have gotten that  
by staying home and studying…

But he wouldn’t have understood  
without the slap to his face, either.


End file.
